:3

I’ve never been involved in politics, because I’m not political. I’ve never been involved in academia, because I’m not academic. I’m not anything, in fact. I like creative writing, art/illustration, videography, and photography, and I’m gonna try to focus on these areas while I work day jobs. 

It’s funny, ‘cause I don’t really feel that I am deeply rooted to or attached to anything in particular, in life. At first I thought that this was a symptom of unwellness and adrift. But now I’m realizing that I’m actually rooted to god and to the idea of a peaceful connection with god, in this life and the next. I think allah swt would want me to let go of all that’s bothering me, he doesn’t want me to be distressed about it, overwhelmed by it. I’m not really sure why half of the things happened the way they did, in my life. I’m not sure why they had to happen the way they did; it often seems like it doesn’t make any sense. Looking back at certain things, they definitely make no sense—I don’t understand why it unfolded like that. The absurdity of it is damaging, psychologically damaging.

I turn 29 in 24 days. I’m going to try to be healthy and focused, for this coming year. I’ll try to let go of fear and worry.

I posted some sticky notes and a whiteboard/reminder board, on the wall in my room. Next to my sitting area. -I hope I find employment, soon. I’m looking around for work in my neighborhood/city. I plan to work someplace, while I complete my certificate in film/video and photography. -And I actually have an ongoing volunteer position with a nonprofit in a different state; I have that going on, currently. It’s in videography, I’m helping to edit their video footage and create video films. It’s an online opportunity; I’m doing it remotely, from home.